Chatroulette

So, this site is kind of like the black or red part of roulette. According to 5 minutes of research, you have about a 50-50 shot of seeing a dude jerking off. I don't like them odds. I must've seen 6 guys whacking it in way too short a time span. Don't you people have fucking lives? I mean, I don't have a life and I'm still not jerking it for the world to see. Does anyone like watching that? Jesus Christ. I feel like technology is devolving us. People will be flinging shit at each other on Skype in no time.

Aaaand rant.

Idea for a Restaurant

BEAR GRYLLS' BAR & GRILL

PONCHOS AND A SINGLE MATCH AVAILABLE AT THE DOOR

BREAKFAST

A ROBIN'S EGG SERVED RAW WITH A SIDE OF MOSS

LUNCH

BLT SANDWICH - THE BRAIN, THE LUNG AND THE TESTICLES OF A RABBIT CRUSHED TO DEATH JUST THIS MORNING BY A FALLING BRANCH, SERVED ON TWO PIECES OF BARK FROM THE SAME BRANCH.

DINNER

ASSORTED INSECTS AND ARACHNIDS, EAT THEM WHILE THEY'RE STILL ALIVE TO GET THE MOST NUTRITION.

TODAY'S SPECIAL

YOUR OWN SHIT, SERVED AS A PATE, OVER A BED OF FISH GUTS.

DRINKS

LAKE WATER
POND WATER
RIVER WATER
FJORD WATER
TRIBUTARY WATER
RECYCLED URINE

IT IS ADVISABLE THAT ONE DOES NOT EAT FOR SEVERAL DAYS BEFORE DINING AT THE BEAR GRYLLS BAR & GRILL. PLEASE NOTE THAT ANYONE WHO HAS A WEAK STOMACH MAY DIE. NO SHARING PLATES.